Mistakes
by Kazekirei
Summary: After mistyping a website URL, Kabuto sees a popup on his screen. Mistaking a fanfiction to be a poison guide, Kabuto and Kimimaro learn the atrocities of the fandom. T for slight language, and for M rated things implied, though not too many details.
1. The Typo

A/N: I do not own Naruto. Or Kimimaro wouldn't have died. T.T Yeah, this is crack-induced. Note: I made up the fanfiction title, so don't bash me for that.

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"Png!" went Kabuto's old computer as he noticed a new e-mail alert. 

"To: Medick55oto.nin; From: FoxehRamen2011konoha.nin; Time: 2:34 pm; Subject: Sasuke," Kabuto murmured to himself. It wouldn't matter if he opened it, he had very strong virus protection, and the Kyuubi boy was a total dumbass either way. He hesitated, then clicked "Read," and prepared himself for some stupid prank. How he he gotten ahold of Kabuto's email anyway? Oh well, he'd fix that later. Kabuto scanned the email, and saw that the subject was misleading. As he suspected, Naruto had sent a stupid comic of some fictional character. He sighed, and clicked delete. As his inbox loaded, Kabuto pulled up another window to play games on, but misspelled "GameChannel.nin" by typing "GameChaneel.nin." And one letter is all it takes.

He moved the mouse to the URL bar to correct his error, and a pop-up filled the screen, spelling out in dark letters, when Kimimaro barged into his room, demanding to know where Orochimaru was. Apparently, Sasuke had done something-or-other and Kimimaro wanted to find Orochimaru and report it to him, and hope that it dimished Sasuke's importance in his master's eyes. Kabuto swore the younger boy was obsessed.

"No, Kimimaro-kun, I have no clue where Orochimaru-sama is," Kabuto replied, annoyed. Kimimaro turned to leave, but doubled back and peered over Kabuto's shoulder.

"Why does that site say Orochimaru-sama's name on it?" Kimimaro inquired. Oh, boy. Now Kimimaro was seeing Orochimaru-sama's name everywhere. But no, there it was. "Click it," Kimimaro said. Kabuto obliged, and was directed to a list of document links. One said, "Lemon, Oro/Kabu/Kimi.", and another ducument said "Oro/Sasu--Fluff". Kabuto had no clue what meant, and he wasn't sure if he wanted to find out.

"Which one should we click?" Kimimaro asked, wary. Kabuto didn't know. But "fluff", whatever that was, seemed less important than a "lemon", because he had used lemons a few times in creating weak poisons to make a few of the other Otonins sick as a punishment. They still believed it was food poisoning. Anyways, moving on.

"Well, fluff doesn't sound too helpful," the Kaguya boy speculated, mimicking Kabuto's thoughts. Kabuto moved the cursor over the link, which was entitled "A Different Type of Poison," and clicked, not knowing the huge mistake they had just made.

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A/N: So, I hope you enjoyed that! More to come soon, if I get enough reviews. (hinthintnudgenudge) Jaa matane! 


	2. The Window

**A/N: **Second chappie is here! I need inspiration! If you have any twists or ideas you're wanting to send, just PM them to me or whatnot. I'll give credit in the chapter it's used, if I decide to use it.

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After Kabuto had clicked the blue link with his cursor, he started to read. Kabuto leaned forward slightly in his chair, reading the text that had just filled the screen. "What fuck is this...?" he gasped. He blinked a few times. No, it wasn't a sick illusion. Some pervert had sat down and typed a horrendous story including him, Orochimaru-sama, and Kimimaro-kun. Kimimaro tugged on the older boy's sleeve insistently. 

"Let me see-" Kimimaro began, but stopped when he saw Kabuto's expression. He was NOT a happy medic-nin, to say the least. Kabuto abruptly sat up, obscuring Kimimaro's view of the moniter, and clicked out of the offending window. "I'm taking a shower," the medic-nin murmured, obviously embarrassed, angry, or a mix of the two.

Kimimaro waited until Kabuto exited the room, and sat down in the chair. The Kaguya boy opened the web browser, and pressed "ctrl+H", which opened the history, and he found Kimimaro found the same document, and opened it. He skimmed the wall of text, and his mouth dropped open in a mixture of utter shock and disgust at some of the racy things said. This was a lemon? Kimimaro felt his cheeks burn, and vowed to kill the author of the story. How could the imbecile who wrote that actually be pleased enough to post that where everybody could find it? Was the author sick in the head?

Kimimaro got to his feet shakily, and slunk out of the room, slamming the door behind him. Unfortunately, he hadn't clicked the oh-so-important red X that was valuable in getting rid of sick stories written by twisted, perverted psyychopaths who can't get laid. He accidentally clicked minimize, which made the fanfiction available to anybody who happened to walk into the room and browse the Internet.

As he turned the corner, he saw Sasuke, who merely raised an eyebrow at Kimimaro's presence. Stupid arrogant bastard. They passed each other without a word, and Kimimaro hurried away from that hall, not realizing his folly until he had gone to almost the other side of his master's lair. Wait. Kimimaro stopped in his tracks. The only room of interest to Sasuke would likely be the computer room. The only other rooms in that hallway were a small restroom and a closet. Immediately, he spun on his heel and hurried upstairs. Nobody must see that disgusting story, he though. Kabuto and himself had been tainted already, but really. The humiliation of it all. Kimimaro almost collided with Tayuya, who cursed violently at the near-accident.

"What's with you?" she snarled. "Looking for your boyfriend, Kabuto?" Oh, shit. Had Tayuya also seen it? No, he was being paranoid. But maybe... "I don't have time for your unimportant comments." Kimimaro said, and promptly dismissed the redhead. "Bitch," he whispered under his breath. He continued on his way to the computer room, hoping to Kami that Sasuke-san wasn't reading the fanfiction

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"Why was Kimimaro-san blushing?" Sasuke thought to himself as he entered the computer room, wanting to play Madness. He never told anybody, but he liked to pretend his virtual enemies were Itachi. That was better kept a secret. Sasuke also needed to ask Kabuto how to send a virus to that clown, Naruto. Sasuke made a mental note of that, and sat down in front of the screen. There was a window minimized. He should leave it alone, but he couldn't resist. 

"What the hell is a fanfiction?" he wondered as he clicked the window to full size, curious to read the text that had been so terribly concealed. Famous last thoughts.

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**A/N:** Poor them. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	3. The Threat

**Disclaimer: **(Oh, and before I forget, I don't own Naruto.)**  
**

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**A/N:** Thanks to all of my fabulous reviewers! (I don't mind if I'm called a sadistic bastard, as long as it's a compliment. That was actually one of my fave reviews, XD.) I plan to continue this story to 4+ Chapters, ideas are ALWAYS loved... 

**Credit:** Chapter idea credit goes to the great oto.medick.nin, who is specialistically awesome!

**ONTO THE STORY! **

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**Sasuke's POV:**

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"What...the...fuck?" Sasuke managed to mutter to himself in utter shock and horror. He was loyal to Orochimaru-sama, but only because of his quest for power; noting like this story described in awfully descriptive detail. Even though Sasuke was fairly certain Orochimaru wasn't too out of character... He'd gotten VERY strange looks from his master, as had Kimimaro-san, which deeply disturbed the Uchiha boy. 

Sasuke positioned his cursor over that wonderful red X and clicked it, desperate to close out the disgusting fiction. But, of course, he got a little error saying "Inter-nin Explorer is not responding currently. We apologize for the inconvenience," which was geek-speak (or Kabuto-speak, in his opinion.) for "Ha. We froze your computer, so you'd get in trouble. Fuck you, and sorry for any inconvenience."

"Shitshitshit," Sasuke cursed as he clicked furiously on the "End Now" button.  
"I wouldn't expect such filthy words to come from your mouth, Sasuke-kun," crooned a snake-like voice from just behind him. Sasuke almost jumped out of his skin as he realized Orochimaru-sama had most likely read that cursed story over his shoulder. "Did you write this, my dear Sasuke-kun? If so, I think it was very descriptive," his master murmured to him, grinning evilly. Okay, now Sasuke was absolutely sure beyond a shadow of a doubt that Orochimaru-sama was some sort of gay/bi pedophile.

"O-Orochimaru-sama..." the nervous boy stammered, REALLY creeped out now. "Somebody else was reading it! I wouldn't ever write anything like this!" Sasuke exclaimed. Orochimaru actually had a hurt look on his face after his container's outburst. "Kimimaro's lived with this guy for how many years exactly?" wondered the Uchiha as he practically flew out of the room, feeling sympathy for the Kaguya, not knowing that Orochimaru had pulled up another window and bookmarked the perverted story.

**Tayuya's POV:**

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Tayuya, already suspicious of what was going on after the Kimimaro episode, was really weirded out as Sasuke-sama bolted right past her, the expression on his face suggesting that he was running for his life. 

"Or his virginity," Tayuya thought with a smirk, seeing Orochimaru-sama exit the same room just after him. "What is the deal?" she wondered, not exactly sure she wanted to know. Instead, she chose to ask Kimimaro. Kabuto was locked in his little lab deal, Sasuke was running far away, or at least to the other side of Orochiamru-sama's lair, so Kimimaro was her only choice. It didn't take long for Tayuya to locate the albino-looking Kaguya, who was sitting at the table, just staring. With a freaked-out look on his face.

"Kimimaro, what the fuck did you see?"   
"None of your business, now is it, Tayuya," he smirked with his usual snobbiness, anxiety suddenly gone.   
"Oh, okay then. Why don't I just go up and see?" she taunted, turning on her heeel to head back to the computer room. Suddenly, the older boy was right in front of Tayuya, an ivory bone at her throat.  
"You better not," Kimimaro stated darkly. He pressed the bone a bit harder, drawing a bit of blood. "If you do, I will torture you in the cruelest way possible, and then I will dismember and kill you if I catch you snooping," he threatened.

"Fine," Tayuya wheezed as he released her. Kimimaro stalked away, and she could practically see a dark, angry cloud hovering above his head, yet he seemed almost embarrassed once again. There was no way she would pass up a chance for blackmail; she just had to see.

"Fine," she repeated, rubbing her throat. "I won't let you catch me."

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**A/N: **I hope you liked this chapter! PLEASE review!! 


	4. The Hysteria

**A/N:** Hey, everybody! I'm **really **sorry for the lack of update! But guess what? To try and make up for it, I've extended the chapter quite a bit, and maybe, just **maybe**, I might make it more than five chapters, if everything goes as planned. Yeah, I was busy with doctor's visits, school, testing, moving, writers' block, being lazy, procrastinating, etc. etc. (XD Kabuto would have had a field day, I've been at the doctor's so often!) Anyways, just like in the last chapter, if you loyal reviewers have any ideas for this story, or another, then either PM, e-mail, or review it to me. I'm slipping a little SakonTayu fluff in, just a warning for everybody. Onto the 4th chapter!

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**Tayuya's POV: **

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Tayuya was determined to find out what the others, especially Kimimaro, were so jumpy about. Sasuke looked terrified, and Kimimaro seemed on edge. No, more like over the edge. 'Stupid fuckers,' she thought, sprinting towards the computer room. If it was as bad as Tayuya thought it was, then all those shitty fucktards were toast. Or something. 

She slowed her pace, breathing hard. She opened the door, and sat down on the hard stool. There was no window on the monitor, nothing to suggest the apparent catastrophe. "Do those dipshits think I'm stupid?" Tayuya muttered to herself, hitting the ctrl+H keystroke, and browsing through the 'History' folder. Tayuya took this time to look through each website that the others had been on, glad that it also listed whose account viewed.

Tayuya snickered. So, Sakon watched gay porn, eh? And since when did Kidoumaru play Neopets? And...Kin liked pony dress-up? What did Kimimaro do? she wondered, sifting through the sites some more. Tayuya opened a new window, only to see that Kimimaro roleplayed gory crap. "Stupid fuck," she said, wishing she had something to incriminate him. Oh well. She clicked on the "A Different Type of Poison" link, and started to read.

Her mouth slowly dropped open in shock as she finished the "lemony goodness," as the author oh-so-lovingly proclaimed. She positioned the cursor to exit the window, but decided to leave the story up for others to see. "Maybe Sakon will get a few kicks, that pervert," Tayuya smirked to herself. She skimmed through it once more, and left the room, searching for Orochimaru, Sasuke, Kabuto, or Kimimaro.

Tayuya stopped in her tracks as she heard what sounded like Sasuke screaming "No, Orochimaru-sama!" and tried to restrain her laughter. She stopped by Kabuto's lab, hoping the medic was out of the 'shower'. Most likely, he was running the water while hiding his head in his hands, terrified to show his face. She would be. Tayuya heard his annoying baritone...singing? This time, she did burst out laughing, and his song immediately paused. She heard some yelling, but the water muffled any protests he may had have. Tayuya was practically skipping down the stony halls of her master's lair, or about as close to skipping as Tayuya could get, being the bitch she was. Was this her day, or what?

"Hey, Kimimaro!" she called, a devilish gleam in her eye. "Has Kabuto poisened you with any new _poisons_ lately?" she said, sauntering up to the Kaguya prodigy. Tayuya's rare, almost demented grin grew even wider as Kimimaro paled noticeably, his skin almost matching the white tint of Orochimaru-sama's. "Oh, what's wrong?" she cooed, mock concern spreading across her face. "Are you actually embarassed at being portrayed as Orochimaru-sama's _sex toy_ on the inter-nin, which we all know you are, by the way," Tayuya rambled, unable to stop her thoughts from forming into words. Kimimaro's emerald green eyes hardened, and Tayuya knew she had wandered into dangerous territory.

"Don't...EVER...say that again..." He snarled through gritted teeth. Tayuya knew she had hit a nerve, and decided to stop pushing it, but as it all turned out, that damn fairy Sakon had been listening. "Did I hear something about you being a sex toy, Kimimaro?" he sneered. Sakon had stupidly been taunting Kimimaro all he could, ever since Kabuto had pronounced the Kaguya terminally ill, though he was still strong enough to take Sakon down without much of a problem. Kimimaro stiffened noticeably.  
"Sakon, we know that you wished I was gay, so, no, you didn't hear anything. Well, you didn't hear anything worth listening to," he drawled, some of his arrogance coming back as he shot a fierce glare at Tayuya.  
"You're probably bi, because we all know you wanna screw Tayuya," Sakon mumbled more to himself than to Kimimaro. Kimimaro obviously heard, she could tell by he way his hands curled into fists inside of his sleeves, but he chose to ignore it.

"Poison freak," she laughed, unable to resist a final jab. "And you," Tayuya's voice rose in anger as Sakon's comment sunk in. "You are going to die!" Sakon looked at her a bit nervously as she pulled out her flute, but diverted her attention by asking _the_ question. "What was the poison deal about?" he inquired, feigning innocence, if that was possible for Sakon.

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**Sakon's POV:  
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Sakon hurried to catch up with Tayuya. If she was laughing and smiling, it must be _really_ be bad. 'Does Kimimaro look at medic porn, or something?' he wondered. Stupid pop-up ads. They reached the computer room, and Tayuya practically shoved him inside. "Holy shit, woman, don't try to rape me!" he exclaimed, banging his elbow against the door.

"Eh...shut up, fairy, you'd probably want it," she said vacantly, fingers flying over the keyboard as she pulled up what seemed to be a story of some sort. Tayuya stood up and shoved the lipstick-wearing boy into the chair. "Read it!" she commanded sharply, though she was grinning. Sakon, for once, stayed quiet, and obeyed.

"That's hot," he said, and looked at Tayuya. As soon as they made eye contact, they both started shaking with spasms of laughter. It wasn't that funny if you read it alone with the intent of revenge, but somehow, with Sakon's comment, the whole day suddenly seemed hilarious. The laughter petered out into fits of giggles, and finally faded out into silence.

"By the way," Tayuya said, looking up at Sakon. "Did you know that Kidoumaru plays Neopets? And that Kabuto-sensei sings in the shower?" she divulged, finally telling him about her disturbing day. It was one of those rare times were they weren't trying to kill each other. Soon, they were suffering from hiccups from laughing so hard all over again. both of the Otonins went quiet once more as Tayuya felt Sakon's hand on hers. She leaned her head forward so her crimson hair would fall in front of her face, concealing her blush.

The akward silence continued as they heard a knock on the door. "You two decent?" They heard Kidoumaru's voice ask playfully. "It's safe!" Sakon called. The door opened, and Kidoumaru sat down next to them. "What's so hilarious? And why's everybody acting so dodgy, anyway?" he asked. Tayuya and Sakon looked at each other, and snickered. "Come on, tell me!" the spider-nin pleaded. The other two looked at each other, and stood up, preparing to leave. "Just read that story, it will explain everything," they said in unison, leaving Kidoumaru so he could die of hysteria in peace.

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**A/N:** Hope you guys liked this chapter! Please review! So, sorry for the slow update, I promise the next one will not be so long! 


	5. The End

**A/N:** OHMYGOD. I'm so sorry I broke my promise yet again to update soon...-shameshameshame- WHY?! Why am I such a procrastinator? What did I do? Now, enough wangst. I GOT A PUPPY! She's a tan-and-white Italian Greyhound, about three months. Her name's Zelda, and she is CUTE! 3. Now, FINALE FORTH! -shot-

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**Sakon's POV: **

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Sakon casually glanced over at Tayuya, then back at the door with a knowing grin, where Kidoumaru was about to be scarred for life. Either that, or he'd get a new hobby. Not like it mattered much, whichever way that went. He was tempted to double back and listen at the door, but didn't. Besides, who was to say that he didn't enjoy being around Tayuya? At least, it was okay when she wasn't being a total bitch. Sakon had to admit that she was sort of pretty, but he would never admit that to anybody else, not even Ukon. Tayuya noticed his silence, lips curling up in a sneer. 

"What's wrong, fairy?" she smirked. "Do you miss that story already?" Well. Sakon supposed that the not-quite-as-rude-Tayuya was gone, and wouldn't return any time soon. And...his hunch was correct. Of course.

"Well, I don't know about you, but our dear Sasuke-sama," Tayuya began, a look of resentment crossing her face as she thought of the Uchiha prodigy, whom none of the Sound 5 enjoyed having around, "will never hear the end of this," she finished, absentmindedly fingering her beloved flute.

She turned the corner of one of the endless, dim corridors, and entered what would be the kitchen, Sakon tagging along. At this point, Sakon had no idea why he was following her. He spun on his heel, deciding to make good of the idea to...check, for lack of a better word, on Kidoumaru. At mentioning this to her, she responded with a particularly eloquent, "Do I look like I fucking care, fag?" Instead of responding with a snarky comment of his own, which was normally customary for the effeminate boy, Sakon turned on his heel, heading back from the way of which he had came.

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**Orochimaru's POV:**

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Orochimaru's snakelike golden eyes narrowed in a mixture of amusement and confusion. He had cornered his protege and future container, Sasuke, in an attempt to get him to spar with his master, just to test how much the Uchiha's power had progressed since his arrival. Instead, the breach of privacy had ellicited a desperate "No, Orochimaru-sama!", which had contributed to his mild confusion. 

Then it struck the serpent master. The story. The thought nearly caused Orochimaru to start laughing on the spot. "Sasuke-kun, do you always believe what you read?" he snickered. "If so, you're quite foolish." Orochimaru nearly saw the Uchiha's relief wash over him.

"Well, Sasuke-kun, if you're so immature as of now, then I won't even bother testing your power. As far as I know or care, you possess no power," Orochimaru hissed. Anger flared in the Uchiha prodigy's eyes, but he contained it well, not wanting to anger his master.

"Of course, Orochimaru-sama," said Sasuke in a cold monotone, bowing stiffly. Orochimaru gazed at him for a moment. "What a perfect body," he murmured to himself, tongue running across his lips.

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**Kidoumaru's POV: **

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"What in the hell is this?" Kidoumaru wondered, both mentally and emotionally scarred by the disgusting work known only as "fan-fiction". He was about to give Sakon a piece of his mind. It wasn't that Kidoumaru couldn't stand that stuff, but when it was about people he knew? And feared, to some extent? No thanks. 

Kidoumaru stood up, and exited the dimly lit room. "Sakon!" he shouted, only to find the purple-haired boy nearly hit in the face as he pushed open the door with a bit more force than necessary. "Why the hell did you and Tayuya make me read this?" he groaned, still unable to get the many disturbing mental images that appeared out of his head.

"I didn't make you read anything," Sakon answered, smirking. "I just...pointed it out," he finished, with one raised eyebrow. And true it was.

"So...you've corrupted the minds of all of the Sound Five once more," Kidoumaru said with a sigh. "What next?"

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**OMAKE:**

Orochimaru looked around, wary of his surroundings, almost to the point of being paranoid. Right, left, nothing. The corridor was deserted. Perfect. With stealth only rivaled by his fellow Sannin and the Kages, he crept into the computer room, taking a seat in front of the gently glowing moniter. The Sannin pulled open Inter-nin Explorer, and clicked on the 'Bookmarks' tab, scrolling down to find the taboo story. Success. Leaning in, Orochimaru read the fanfiction once more.

"Kukuku..."

_ fin._


End file.
